Media Bitch


BBC radio presenter Jeff Randall must be popular with his bosses, at least one set of them.

Last week, Randall, who also goes by the title of editor-at-large at the Telegraph, wrote his column about ITV's search for a new chief executive, which has seen the nationals and misguided trade magazines tip virtually everyone in broadcasting except Michael Grade.

Randall penned: "I remain baffled why the headhunters didn't just go straight to the BBC, UK broadcasting's biggest talent pool... publicly, of course, many BBC high-flyers insist they'd never work for ITV. Loadsamoney is a powerful mind changer."

But as ITV's chairman Sir Peter Burt helps himself to some of Grade's trademark cigars and enjoys a rare coup against the BBC, what of the new executive chairman himself? Grade, with broadcasting and, of course, the National Lottery running through his veins, along with all the cigar smoke, has already written his autobiography, entitled It Seemed A Good Idea At The Time.

What on earth is he going to call the latest chapter? My Moment Of Madness perhaps?

Speaking of predictions, a dark horse for Grade's new second-in-command, who else but Tessa Jowell. Perhaps she could take on the task of getting ITV out of the CRR - after all, she won the Olympics single handed, didn't she?

As for Grade's replacement, surely there's only one man to lead the BBC's quest for a gut-busting licence fee - step forward Charles Allen (pictured).


Media Bitch isn't often left open-mouthed by her postbag, or more accurately her e-mail box, but this week friends in the magazine and IPTV world sent in a couple of saucy suggestions that did make her blush.

Touched, in more ways than one, by Bitch's column two weeks back referring to the useless freebie posters being given out these days in seemingly every national newspaper, the lovely Gavin at Scarlet magazine sent in a reminder of a slightly racier poster it offered its readers recently - a huge selection of the latest vibrators on offer.

As if that wasn't enough, the mag is even offering one of these gadgets in question to anybody who subscribes. It brings a whole new meaning to the phrase "fingers on the buzzers".

Not to be outdone, new web TV channel kindly offered Bitch the chance to try out being one of its online presenters. Yet, judging by the lengths some are obviously prepared to go to, given the showreel of a girl called Layla (pictured) who had her own very direct way of landing a job, Bitch may find it too hard to swallow. Who says sexual equality is dead? See to find out.


Hats off to TalkSport breakfast presenter Alan Brazil (pictured right) for bucking the recent trend towards DJs doing the dirty work for their advertisers.

Recently, several stations, including the no-nonsense sports broadcaster itself, have taken to getting their stars to read out ads or take listeners through cringe-worthy advertorials because, let's face it, advertisers' cash on radio, or anywhere for that matter, has been hard to find and DJs can add a little credibility and razzmatazz.

So Bitch was pleasantly surprised to find that the former Manchester United, Ipswich and Stambridge FC forward - and it doesn't get more razzmatazz than Stambridge - has not completely forgotten his journalistic integrity.

In a discussion about what was the worst job in the world (it's a London cabbie, according to reports), Brazil suggested that nothing could be worse than the "scum of the earth" who tow away people's cars.

There could be no excuse, he said, even taking into account imminent starvation and homelessness, for taking on such a job.

Unfortunate perhaps that the next ad was from the DVLA encouraging listeners to get their car tax or face being towed away and a hefty fine.

Brazil's comments suggest he himself has suffered once or twice at the hands of the clampers.

Mind you, at the speed he used to move, he could have got a parking ticket in the penalty area.


27% - Meetings: meetings with existing clients, meetings with potential ones, meetings about meetings. Where I can, I try to simply listen and observe.

22% - Reading and research: people-friendly is the Cunning philosophy and that means always being curious as to what's going on in the world. I scan as many good trend sources as I can - Anterior Insight and Trend-spotting being two good examples.

19% - General management: I'm blessed with a hugely capable and inspiring senior management team, so this is an ever-decreasing part of my day.

17% - E-mail: it's my main communication tool and I'm lucky that someone helps me wade through my inbox.

5% - New people: we're always loooking for fresh talent, whether it's permanent staff or ad hoc collaborators, such as good brand planners.

4% - NYLON: our London and NY offices discuss as many briefs as possible.

4% - Commuting: in spite of my 20mph G-Whiz, I have a comfortable 22-minute door-to-door commute.

2% - Broader world: schedule allowing, I attend one or two talks and/or exhibitions a week.

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