Time to face up to it, Matt
For Matt Blore, account executive at MindShare, what goes around comes around, the worm has turned, revenge is a dish best served cold, you reap what you sow, etc, etc.
Office joker Blore managed to stitch up not one, but two, of his MindShare colleagues – Rob McCave and Glenn Burchall – by sending in embarrassing photos to Bitch – both of which she was more than happy to share with the world.
Now, one of his victims has hit back with this photo of Blore.
As our revengeseeker puts it: “He hasn’t noticed his head is melting into his five chins.”
Yahoo! faces Rat attack
Fru Hazlitt, managing director at Yahoo! UK, experienced a practical lesson in why you should never work with celebrities when she tried to organise a rock ’n’ roll party for a Yahoo! event.
She told attendees at Carat’s Tomorrow’s Media World conference last week how she booked old rockers Dave Stewart and Bob Geldof to attend the party – and paid them quite a lot of money to make speeches and say nice things about Yahoo! Imagine her shock when exBoomtown Rat Geldof got up to make his speech and said: “I don’t know why I’m speaking at this conference, I hate the fucking internet, everyone I know hates the fucking internet, my children hate the fucking internet.” Among other criticisms, Geldof said the internet was too slow, didn’t work properly and was “vulgar”.
Fortunately for Hazlitt, who was mentally rewriting her resume at this point, he went on to say that he had “no doubt that the internet was the most important new technology ever”.
Face like a slapped…
The conference was hosted by Theresa White, media partner at Accenture, who seemed to enjoy baiting the boys from Carat.
When Alex Altman, head of communications planning at Carat, finished his speech by telling the audience that he was “excited” by the new developments in media, White said: “I’m glad you're excited, next time tell your face about it”.
Ouch! Unfamiliar face
White also asked Colin Mills, managing director at Carat, to state who he is and why he was here when he asked a question.
The first time he deflected by saying: “Who knows, is the only answer to the second question.” But when he asked a second question, she asked him again: “Sorry, who are you”? “Colin Mills”, he muttered, obviously embarrassed.
The Mann without a face
It’s not often Bitch experiences that emotion called sympathy, but on this occasion you have to feel sorry for David Mann, sales executive for Adshel.
Only occasionally does a sales executive get a chance to star in the ads they deal with, so Mann’s face must have lit up when he was asked to pose as a lazy estate agent in a bus shelter campaign in Birmingham for Manor Estate.
He is, in fact, the first Adshel employee to ever appear on a bus shelter poster.
Unfortunately, he had to cover his face with a newspaper.
THE TWO-MINUTE TEST
Set by Adam Waddell, publisher, BBC Top Gearmagazine
1 According to TGI, 100% of motoring magazine buyers use toilet paper. What percentage of non-motoring magazine buyers use toilet paper?
a) 100% b) 99.9% c) 98.97%
2 On one occasion, Playboy magazine replaced its traditional centrespread content with an ad for a car shot in soft focus. What was the car?
a) Volvo b) Mini c) Ferrari
3 Which car manufacturer produced Lady Penelope’s pink car and had other products featured in the recent Thunderbirdsmovie?
a) Rolls Royce b) Renault c) Ford
4 In the Top GearTV show’s Star in a Reasonably Priced Car feature, which celebrity has, so far, posted the fastest lap time?
a) Jay Kay b) Jodie Kidd c) Simon Cowell
5 Which sunglasses manufacturer sponsors British F1 star Jenson Button and his BAR team?
a) Ray Ban b) Police c) Arnette
1)c, 2) b, 3)c, 4)c, 5) a