Bitch at the Big Bash
Bitch put on her stilettos, got the little black dress out of the dry cleaners and was off to the ball again this week … well, one of the industry calendar highlights, the Nabs Big Bash.
Getting together with her favourite 'Mad Men' (the theme of the evening), she bumped into TV beanpole Mark Dolan and resisted the urge to tell him she was a massive fan of his 'Balls … of Steel' (it's his TV show, darlings).
Rather unkindly he accused two tables of Clear Channel employees of being out of it on crystal meth (highly unlikely, no one's that exuberant from Clear Channel).
The spindly one then proceeded to pronounce JCDecaux as "JCDecock", before asking "why can't they just be called CBS?"
Later, Bitch was suitably impressed when Tom George's MEC managed to find their way onto stage, this time for putting all the "creatives" to shame by winning the caption competition.
MPG Media Contact's charming Mark Mendoza proved once again just what a great auctioneer he really is, and managed to tease and cajole almost £100,000 from diners on the night alone.
After-dinner entertainment came courtesy of Bitch's friends (and competitors for footballers' attention) The Saturdays. Also, MPG's Alan Brydon's wife Rozalla, the undisputed queen of the rave, sang her number one hit 'Everybody's Free (To Feel Good)', not that Bitch is old enough to remember that my angels.
The head of trading was clearly emotional as he watched her performance on the big screen at the back, "I've never seen her on a screen this big before".
It wasn't the biggest performance of the evening however as that prize went to Global Radio group CEO Stephen Miron, who auctioned off a prize of a mentoring session...with himself. Egos darling, egos.
Bitch then spotted Chris Maples, formerly of Microsoft Advertising, who was telling anyone who would listen that he was not going to confirm his appointment as the UK managing director of Spotify, which is of course not happening in the second week of April, Bitch believes you darling!
Elsewhere, Bitch couldn't help feel sorry for the OK! contingent who confessed they know "they're always up for sale and everything has a price as far as Desmond is concerned" – The Grauniad will be pleased to learn there was no net or "fishing" apparatus in sight. You know what they say about imitation.
The event capped off a widely celebrated first year for Nabs chief executive Zoe Osmond and her very-own trusty Boudica, Pippa Glucklich (Arena Media by day).
Bitch must admit, that like a lot of you in adland this morning, the Berroca's been broken out, and a glass of fizz is in the offing later on, just to get this girl back on track.
At the Copa, Copacabana
News comes to Bitch that former managing director of thelondonpaper, Ian Clark, is about to don his Speedos to take part in the Rio Big Swim on Copacabana Beach next week. The race consists of 2,000 beautiful people, and Ian, taking part in the 3.5 mile race called the Travessia Dos Fortes, "crossing of the strong".
Although Bitch is sure you spend enough time down at the gym, are you sure that's not grazing the Trade Descriptions Act, darling?
Bitch gives Relief a hand
Bitch loves a bit of work for charity, as she's a very giving girl as it is (as some of you in media know full well), so she always looks forward to Red Nose day – for some of you on Charlotte Street that's every Friday after a "let's have another bottle" lunch.
But she's really proud of you meeja types who get into the spirit of things. She especially likes the sisters at Active International, who obviously spend a lot of time on their backs, if this photo is anything to go by…
Of course Bitch means sleeping, and not other nocturnal activities. The girls raised money for Comic Relief by wearing their pyjamas to work for a day. They also held a raffle for a pair of tickets to a concert at the O2, donated by Absolute Radio. In total they raised £1,500, which Bitch is assured was three times their original target.
Across to Initiative, who were real superheroes for the cause (as you can see from the photo). The Interpublic company's staff raised £400 with fancy dress and a raffle … and, £5 lie-in vouchers.
Is it just Bitch, or is Comic Relief Day in media just an excuse for a bloody good kip?
Until next week darlings, ciao. xxx